.. and now the Ugly..

Up until now it's been mostly Good with a little Bad - now we get to the Ugly...and NO, Joann didn't throw a hot iron at me, not that I remember... Have been talking about the radiation redness on my back for several weeks now. Don't mean to gross anyone out, but this is what it is today, a full blown burn...and it's been a week since the last treatment. Actually this is better than it looked a week ago when it was so bad Jo refused to take a picture of it...and she has seen some pretty nasty stuff working for surgeons. Odd that the radiation I thought would be a breeze is giving me the most trouble. Still a small price to pay if it does what it's intended to do. Other than this everything is returning to normal. Not as tired as I've been for the past seven weeks and my strength is coming back. I've even got a jump on the physical therapy thing - nothing crazy - just loosening up, doing a little cardio and using muscles that have been idle for awhile - feels good. I'll be getting serious after the first of the year. Hope the PT helps my golf game .. I imagine this is Carl's wish also...I cost him alot of money last summer.
Hope you all had a great Christmas with your families, thanks again for your kind words and prayers (and putting up with my incoherent ramblings) and we'll continue on after the New Year.
LIVESTRONG

Family time

Jo and I went to our first Christmas party of the season at Joe Hassell's place in Davisburg Saturday. Some of you know the Hassell's, most don't, so let me tell you a bit about them. L to R : Frank, who is solely responsible for getting me into FoMoCo and teaching me it's the work that's important in the corporate world, advise I passed on to my sons. I owe my career to this man. Brian, the youngest, who put himself through Eastern Michigan on a football scholarship and was the first in the family to earn a college degree - great kid. Joe, who is quite a craftsman in his own right, does the property mgmt thing by day, runs marathons because he can and whose passion is music. Joe wrote a song about a guy that had a stroke ten years ago that blew me away. To say his music comes from the heart is an understatement. Debbie always had an artistic flair, is teaching art in the Brighton school district and has had over 1000 students pass through her class w/o any casualties. Her and Yves have three great kids that are growing up way too fast. And then there's Horton, my oldest cousin (by some accounts) at 73. My mother and Aunt Fritz were always trying to hook her up with my cousin Mickey, What no one knew is she had a thing for Bob Nagaj, who, of course was younger. So I guess that makes her a cougar. Whatever, she's still one of my favorite people. It's a shame she will likely never speak to me again after reading this... Next month she is taking her granddaughter out for a drink on her 21st birthday - how cool is that ? I'll be 79 before I can do that with Avery...I can wait.
This is a great time for being with family and friends and I guess I'm looking at it differently this year than in the past. Everyone touches someone in one way or another. Can't take anything or anybody for granted anymore. Maybe none of us should. Have a wonderful Christmas everyone and we'll talk again in a week or so. Hope you enjoyed meeting the Hassell's.
Ken

Self explanitory...

Thought I'd share a poem the nurses gave me after my last treatment of 2009.







Cancer is so limited

It cannot

Cripple love

Shatter hope

Corrode faith

Destroy peace

Kill friendshp

Suppress memories

Silence courage

Invade the soul

Steal eternal life

It cannot

Conquer my spirit

They really know how to push my buttons...

Very emotional day - the nurses from the cocktail lounge came by along with Dr. Henning to exchange good-byes. Got to hug some very nice ladies and my radiology nurses, Barb and Tracy autographed my shaved chest and drew a fork w/ the inscription "It's done". I think the lead walls in the radiation room need to be thicker....
Have been in the care of some incredible people over the last seven weeks and can't thank them enough for making the unthinkable bearable. Same goes for those reading this.
Looking forward to the break until the January 12th cocktail and giving my back time to heal.
Talk to you again soon - have to give Paul a lesson in cribbage.
Ken

Last Call

Last cocktail of 2009 today and glad it's over. My dislike of needles is well documented. As usual the benadryl puts me to sleep and the steroid keeps me awake. Confused ? Think of it this way - I sleep but dream I'm wide awake. There, that ought to clear up any confusion...and it lasts two days. Burn on my back is getting worse so they've prescribed a silver sulfadiazine cream that's specifically for burns - does the trick much better than the hydracortisomedamnthing ointment suggested earlier, which lasted only 20 minutes. Last radiation treatment is this Friday but the effects will last well into January 010. I'll be "glowing" into the new year...
The nurses in radiation and the cocktail lounge are going to miss Joann. She has been taking in baked goods since we started treatment seven weeks ago and the gals always perk up when she hits the door. For me, not so much. Today she took in "crack" - they're all hooked - Jo sure has been a rock through all of this -
Next blog will be Friday - may be the last one as promised in the beginning or I may take it to the final exam in March. Whaddaya think ?
LIVESTRONG

One more week

Heading into the final week of treatments tomorrow. Strangely I compare this to a student facing one more week of class...wondering if he'll made the grade or not...thus the picture of Cass Technical HS in downtown Detroit. Eight floors, four elevators, five minutes between classses with four thousand plus students in the hallways... Man, I loved that place... could write a book about it.
Good size burn on my back from the radiation treatments. Skin is breaking down..not pretty but believe it's a sign that photons charged to 6500 volts and shot at the tumors MUST be destructive. Not that I'm complaining about the sunburn as this is the worst side effect I have experienced. "Grades" ( final CT) come out around the first week of March. We'll be pretty edgy until then, I'm afraid.
My last blog seems to have struck a nerve in several of you, especially the 20% figure. I apologize for that and do appreciate the candor of your comments. I guess when it's someone else, it's 20%, but when it's yourself, it's always 100%. Talk to you again Tuesday after my last cocktail of 2009.
LIVESTRONG

It's not all this easy...

My question to Dr Henning today was "what's next?" So far he has been very cautious to discuss the future, opting instead to discuss the present, no doubt due to his highly structured "Ready, Aim, Fire" approach to his trade, (unlike the "Ready, Fire, Aim" mentality I'm accused of possessing). Here's the Reader's Digest version of our conversation.

The ACS is reporting that overall cancer related deaths in the US are decreasing 2% yearly, which is fantastic news, but the 5 year survival rate for lung cancer patients remains at best 20%. Hell, I faced better odds making it out Jeff Haller's office alive ! (The Ford launch guys just had a chill run up their spines, believe me)

The reality is that I can expect a reoccurance as soon as several months to many years down the road after this round of treatments is over. The good news is we'll be ready for it, not blindsided and deal with it. Joann and I have met and spoke to people that are currently being treated for their second or third bout of cancer, up to and including one in her 90's. Amazing.

This disease just doesn't let go. I'm telling you this because I am told over 100 people read this thing regularly and I really don't want to be reading your BLOG one day. Live your life your way. I make no apologies for my past lifestyle and expect none from you - but do be honest with your doctor about your bad habits and get checked out yearly. The screenings are painless and early detection is paramount. Just a suggestion from a friend walking the walk....

LIVESTRONG

10 and 2 to go

After today we are looking at 10 radiation treatments and 2 cocktails to complete this year's plan on the 18th of December. If the last two weeks go as well as the first five, I will consider myself very, very fortunate. I was expecting and prepared for much worse.
Last Tuesday in the cocktail lounge the nurses were treating a 94 year old woman in the cubicle next to mine. I had to ask and they told me they never give up on a patient. 94 and still fighting. God love her.
Tomorrow we're headed to Port Austin to see Ric and Deb for the day and to take measurments for a Spring kitchen remodel, which of course will pretty much be a gut job. If you can't hit something with a sledgehammer what's the point ?
Glad I added my e mail address to the last BLOG - hearing from many old friends from Ford - brings back alot of good memories of the worse job I ever loved.
Have a good weekend
Ken

There's a pill for that

My kitchen windowsill pharmacy. Can't read the labels anymore so I mark the tops w/a Sharpie. From L to R : SLEEP, POOP, SORE THROAT, SWALLOWING, COUGH, NAUSEA, HEADACHE, VITAMIN. The KISS theory (Keep It Simple Stupid) at work. Had a rough day in treatment yesterday. A new infusionist, Kay, poked my arm high and didn't hit the vein, it swelled up and she had to poke me again, this time near my wrist. Let's just say the pain was "memorable" and I'm still feeling it today. God, I hate needles, but who doesn't ? Apparently chemo is hard on veins with a tendency to shrink them -harder to stick that garden hose in them. The effects of chemo last about two days but are tolerable, mostly body soreness, a slight headache, ringing in the ears and being tired. Met with Dr Henning again and the reports are still good. Both he and my oncologist have told me if the treatments weren't working, I would be having some very unpleasant side effects, like night sweats, nausea, chills and numbness/tingling in the arms and hands. They constantly ask if I have these symptoms so I have a feeling they're more common than I care to think. Can't imagine others going through that, especially those that are infused multiple times weekly - no time to recover. The only side effects I have now from radiation are skin redness and I've lost my voice - Joann loves the latter...
We now stand at 13 more radiations and 2 cocktails before Christmas and the 2 big cocktails in January.The dates keep changing. May get the final CAT scan in February instead of March - the one that counts.
Talk to ya again Friday.
LIVESTRONG

Break's over, back to work.

Hope everyone had a great holiday weekend -
Had four days off from treatments for Thanksgiving as Black Friday's appointments were pulled ahead to a week ago Sunday - nice break and it gave me time to read the comments and e-mails that you've all sent since we started this deal last month. Some of you really know how to push my buttons...it's all good.
A couple of thoughts from a guy in his first rodeo... I've come to realize that cancer is a very private disease. Those that have it don't like to talk about it. Five days a week I see Russell in the radiation waiting room. He has the appt right after mine. Hellova nice guy. He'll tell you all about his heart transplant 30 years ago at Henry Ford, the plate in his skull and the story behind it, his plastic knees, hip replacement and those lousy Lions, but when I asked him what kind of cancer he has,he said "the bad kind" and changed the subject. No one converses in the infusion side of the center, either in the waiting or treatment rooms. In fact, I rarely make eye contact with other patients eventhough I try. Not that I'm looking for conversation, just a smile or a nod that says we're in rough waters, but we'll get the boat to the dock... Maybe as I get further along I'll understand why, but I have to admit, other than this BLOG, I don't like talking about it either. Not sure if I'll find the answer in the next three weeks.
My other belief is that no one can fight this alone (thought I could at first) and that's pretty much where you all come in. Have heard from people I haven't seen in years (my fault) people I used to boss around at Ford, Paul's friend that reminded me how much fun fishing can be with a girl onboard, my good friend from Tawas that taught me which end of the rod to hold five fishing boats ago, a couple of (now) grandmothers that used to put on makeup before riding dirt bikes in Rose City and of course family, friends and neighbors from Brighton and Port Austin. All a huge part of the treatment, all enjoyed and appreciated beyond words- keep em coming
kmachala@att.net in case you can't get on the BLOG
LIVESTRONG

The cocktail lounge

This is where we hang out for 4 hours every Tuesday. Beautiful new St Joe's facility a few minutes from the house in Brighton. I sit and drink and Jo reads, beads and talks up the nurses, who are terrific. They were telling us that in the past they would start the IV and hand the patient a pail and washcloth - they were going to hurl - no doubt about it. This was my perception of chemo also and I wasn't looking forward to it. The new formulas are a far cry from what they were 5 years ago, per the nurses. The infusionists are the best and the on site pharmacists mix the cocktails the day of treatment. I've been very fortunate that my side effects have been short lived.

Took the weekend off from the BLOG and was ready to write Monday when my PC decided to lock up SOLID - I know it was serious because no amount of beating on the damn thing fixed it...and as I always say, "If you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem". Just got it back today, no worse for wear, and back 0n line.

Today is the end of week 4 , 15 more days of radiation and 5 cocktails to go. Saw our radiologist, Dr Henning, yesterday, whom Jo and I really like and asked why the problem swallowing and cough that was tearing me up last week suddenly disappeared over the weekend. His best guess was that the tumors are shrinking, which was good to hear since that's the goal of all this. Actually all the news was positive - blood pressure OK , blood counts good, ill effects subsiding,lost 9 pounds and Joann hasn't left me yet...yeah, I can be a little difficult...and having cancer isn't an excuse in this house, Sparky...

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving which has special meaning to Joann and I this year, but we all have much to be thankful for. I hope you all know what your thoughts and prayers mean to this old sinner and believe that they're a huge part of our getting through this - it is and we will.

OK, end of sermon - go enjoy the holiday - talk to ya later

Ken

One step forward,two steps back

End of week three and another side effect has popped up. Last week the doctor's made me a happy camper by controlling the night coughs and allowing me to sleep. Pure bliss. Up until now the questions have been "Are you short of breath?" "Does it hurt to swallow?" Now they're phrased "Are you short of breath, yet?" or "Does it hurt to swallow, yet?" Now you know I'm a few fries short of a happy meal, but I picked up on that , so I asked when is this going to happen. Right about now was the answer and they were right again. Haven't experienced the shortness of breath (YET) but the raw throat is here big time from the radiation treatments.
I now have a new cocktail to be taken prior to meals consisting of Benedryl, Lidocaine and Maalox to numb everything up...and it's pink and it makes everything taste like...it's pink. This will last for the duration of the radiation treatments, which may have to be put on hold if the throat gets too bad, something we don't want to happen.
To top it off, Joann lost her voice last night and cannot talk above a whisper today. Yep, one step forward, two steps back...
Have a good weekend everybody and again, thanks for your thoughts and prayers
Ken

It's a date

Approaching the halfway point in the treatment plan, so naturally they added to it. Here are the important dates I look forward to:

November 25th - My brother Dennis turns 60 ! (send him a card )

December 22nd - last radiation treatment and cocktail of "the plan"

January 7th - CAT scan

January 12th - Double dose of the cocktail

January 13th - Joann's birthday (age unknown )

Ferruary 2nd - Another double dose of the cocktail

February 19th - Matt and Katie's due date for another beautiful daughter

February 12th - Matt's turns 32

March 7th - Paul Paul Paul turns 30 !!!

March 10th - CAT scan ( final exam ! )

April 25th - Walleye opening day

The magic cupcake

Thought I'd share my favorite picture of Avery (taken last September) with you today. Now you might think that this has nothing to do with "Papa" going through his cancer treatments..but you'd be wrong.
Today was my long day with cocktail hour followed by radiation followed by meetings with the radiologist and oncologist. Found out last Thursday's crash was due to coming down from the steroid that is part of Tuesday's cocktail. Today's mix had half the amount - we'll see how that works out. Wanted to take a picture of the "infusion rooms" today for you but there were far too many people recieving treatment and I want to respect their privacy. We're all there for the same reason but surprisingly there is very little interaction between patients. I'm fortunate to go there once weekly, some are scheduled three times weekly -yeech ! You might be intrested to know that my "cocktail" is over $5000 per day...once per week times 7 weeks. Do the math - that's a new Vette folks ! Or the Lenard boys summer beer and gas budget...
Worth every penny ...
LIVESTRONG

Week three

Thought you might like to see my IT department, Ben and Samantha Baker and Avery. Imagine what these little ones will see in their lifetimes, eh?
Not much to report for the start of week three. Still looking for the right recipe to deal with the effects of the treatments. My two nurses, Ann and Betty took a shot at it today - see the docs tomorrow, my "long" day.
Ric and Deb came down from Port Austin for a few days here in Brighton. Look forward to the laughter that we always seem to share and the break from the routine.
Ken

Ken,your table is ready.

Some of you will recognize this machine, the rest of you I hope will never have the need to. The tumor blaster that radiates me daily. I walk in the room and the girls say "Strip off your cloths Ken" ....nicest thing that's said to me all day...
Got bitch slapped pretty hard yesterday but some new drugs did the trick and today is much better. Second week of seven is over and only stumbled once - we can do this.
Have a good weekend, thanks again for your responses and we'll talk to you Monday.
Ken

My "HAPPY PLACE"

Will have to put off the "People" BLOG to a later date. The doc's warned me I may feel the effects of the treatments 2 weeks into the plan - missed it by a day - yesterday was it and today isn't much better...no problem, I can handle it...just go off to my "happy place" that the nurses keep telling me to go when I tense up, something I automatically do just before someone jams a needle in my arm or shoots me with lethal doses of radiation. So now you know where it is, on the calm waters of Lake Huron at sunset. We'll feel better tomorrow - promise.
Capt Ken (Just ask Kevin)

" The Plan "

There is a line in one of my favorite movies that went "Those rooskies don't take a dump without a plan, son" Same scenario for the lung cancer team at St Joe's. To say they are dedicated and thorough is an understatement. "The Plan" was formulated only after: a brain CAT scan (nothing found there-what?) a chest CAT scan to measure the tumors (size of a golf ball), a PET scan to identify if the cancer has spread (it hasn't), a lung capacity evaluation (surprisingly just below normal) a biopsy of the lung tumor and a mediasconoptomy of the lymphnode that I wouldn't wish on anyone. Only then did the oncologist, thorasic surgeon. radiologist and"infusionist" (remember that term) sit down in the same room to formulate the path to the cure. They convinced me that cancer is no longer a death sentence if caught early, my tumors are small and less than 2 years old, so "the plan" is that by early Spring, the cancer will be gone.
Like it, let's go.
Surgery was ruled out so radiation and "infusion" are the weopons of choice.
I'm now into my second week of treatments. Radiation 5 days /week and "infusion" on Tuesdays. They call it "infusion", I call it "cocktail hour" and it all means "Chemotherapy" which NO ONE says, EVER! Some stigmas take longer to lose than others. The "cocktail" consists of a bag of saline, a small bag of an anti-nausea drug, a half jigger of steroid and a shot of benadryl before the big bags of Carboplatin and Paclitaxel with blood pressure checks every 15 minutes...hmmm, haven't questioned that yet, don't want to know. The cocktail is modified by my oncologist based on blood draws taken every Monday. White blood counts haven't taken the big dip yet but is expected to in the next two weeks.
Jo and I decided to take part in a case study spearheaded by the MAYO CLINIC cancer team that basically increases dosage and length of radiation treatments which has proven extremely successful in treating throat, brain and colon cancers. When you're looking at a 20% success rate, you tend to take a shot at anything to better the odds.
Treatments are scheduled through December 22nd (Merry Christmas ) with two double doses of the cocktail in January, just about the time I'll be shedding like Holly, but they tell me it will grow back. Cat scans will occur in February(when the glow is gone from all the radiation) to see if we hit a home run or not.
OK, I've bored you long enough - tomorrow we talk about my favorite subject - people.
LIVESTRONG

Week two begins

Joann came back from Port Austin with the idea of creating a BLOG, so here we go. Hopefully this will last only 7 weeks which is the length of my treatment plan, for now.
This BLOG will summarize what we're going through and my spin on it's effects that hopefully I (and you) can look back on in the years to come, when all this is just a bad memory. Please don't let my humor lead you to believe I'm taking this disease lightly. I'm not. Fact is I've been scared shitless ever since we got the news last September. Pictured is one of many reasons I've decided to beat this disease. Talk to you again tomorrow.